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When a man resists a woman’s suggestions she feels as though he doesn’t care; she feels her needs are not being respected. As a result she understandably feels unsupported and stops trusting him.

At such times, by remembering that men are from Mars, she can instead correctly understand why he is resisting her. She can reflect and discover how she was probably giving him unsolicited advice or criticism rather than simply sharing her needs, providing information, or making a request.

Here are some brief examples of ways a woman might unknowingly annoy a man by offering advice or seemingly harmless criticism. As you explore this list, remember that these little things can add up to create big walls of resistance and resentment. In some of the statements the advice or criticism is hidden. See if you can recognize why he might feel controlled.

1 “How can you think of buying that? You already have one.”

2 “Those dishes are still wet. They’ll dry with spots.”

3 “Your hair is getting kind of long, isn’t it?”

4 “There’s a parking spot over there, turn [the car] around.”

5 “You want to spend time with your friends, what about me?”

6 “You shouldn’t work so hard. Take a day off.”

7 “Don’t put that there. It will get lost.”

8 “You should call a plumber. He’ll know what to do.”

9 “Why are we waiting for a table? Didn’t you make reservations?”

10 “You should spend more time with the kids. They miss you.”

11 “Your office is still a mess. How can you think in here? When are you going to clean it up?”

12 “You forgot to bring it home again. Maybe you could put it in a special place where you can remember it.”

13 “You’re driving too fast. Slow down or you’ll get a ticket.”

14 “Next time we should read the movie reviews.”

15 “I didn’t know where you were.” (You should have called.)

16 “Somebody drank from the juice bottle.”

17 “Don’t eat with your fingers. You’re setting a bad example.”

18 “Those potato chips are too greasy. They’re not good for your heart.”